A Month And A Half Later...

As the title says, it is a month and a half since I wrote my last post. (I guess using the word "write" isn't really correct since I type a blog...not write...). There is so much to update and so little time! I suppose that first and foremost I am excited to be able to actually use the internet again! Trying to keep up on a blog on a cell phone is not that much fun. The keys are hard to type on after a while, and I usually seem to have a lot to say (since I go so far in between posts). James and I are finally moved into our house and mostly unpacked, still working on some of the stuff. We have so much space we don't know what to do with it all! Braedan loves running around, playing in the kitchen and going up and down the stairs. He has a whole playroom to himself, the loft area, and he even has his own (not quite put together) bedroom. We're teaching him to sleep in his big boy bed which currently is just his little mattress on the floor. For the most part, we don't use the ball anymore to put him to sleep, we have graduated to gliding in the chair. That is so much easier to do, and then we just lay him down in his bed and he sleeps anywhere from 1-5 hours. I prefer the 5 hours (even though I cannot sleep because I still worry about him breathing right lol). After that he sleeps with me, which I don't mind. It's not going to be forever. Braedan is doing so much now! It seems like every single day he is doing something different and I wonder where he learns half of it from! Right now he is running around the living room with my computer cord trying to figure out how to plug it back in or get it into the wall (which of course is covered by outlet covers : ). He says many words: please, yes, mom, dad, cat, and imitates lots of words we tell him to imitate, he also mimics several things we say. He blows kisses, gives high five's, waves (that's new today!), blows his nose (of course not quite properly lol), if I ask him to put something somewhere he does it, he responds to a lot, and....he even throws huge temper tantrums where he lets his body just melt to the floor and whines and cries...and I just let him be. He thinks he's something else. He loves to play the drums, he experiments with the big drums every week after church, and his grandpa bought him a mini drumset for christmas that he LOVES to play with! He's gonna be a rockstar. Braedan also likes to have music on, and he tries to sing. You can always tell the difference between talking and singing because his pitch changes as if he's really concentrating. He's so cool! I absolutely love my little boy! I can't believe that he is getting bigger and growing older....and he's 15 months. Well, there is so much more I could go on and on and on and on, but I must go for now. I am loving being home with my little man (and the big man too lol). I love being able to cook and take care of something that we (in 30 years lol) own. I hope it gets a little nicer out soon so I can take B out and have some fun! Been bitter icy cold lately. But, he has a nice new snowsuit that nana got him for christmas so maybe I will take him outside to make a snowman or snow angel. I think it's time for some pic updates too! Farewell dear friends, enjoy the evening. Hot cocoa is on the way at my house!

[caption id="attachment_126" align="aligncenter" width="461" caption="Braedan's first snow"][/caption]

My Website Is Launched...Sort Of!

For the past few years I have been back and forth about starting a "singing" business, singing at weddings here and there, placing free business cards around the town...and finally I have a sit of my own with some establishment! Actually, it's just a free .mac trial, but I get it for 60 days, and we'll see after that. I figure though, if I do just one gig that would pay for my site fee for a year! I am a bit excited, but don't expect much out of it. I just feel cool having it. I know, I am a real total dork, but it's ok because I will be doing something I LOVE to do! Not everyone gets to do that! Check it out here: Special Events Vocalist.

Not much time for a real update, just thought I would post my link here since I am up what's going on way too late, have been wanting to do a few things all the while I am sitting on the couch doing nothing but watching HGTV and searching the net. Nothing accomplished. So facebook and blogging is what I resort too, and as soon as I get off my rear, to bed. Maybe some chocolate soy milk will do me some good. Good night to all!

Tears On My Pillow...

I allowed myself to cry. A little. Last night as I was laying in bed listening to my husband talk to me, I just felt so sad, so alone, and usually I can bottle that up. I haven't cried in a long time, but It felt almost good. But it sucked at the same time. I don't like showing emotion, especially a sadness, a vulnerability. But it needed to happen. Part of me wanted to just let out and break down like a child, and I couldn't let myself do it. I still had some control, but the tears were there. I could't stop the stream from coming down onto my pillow and I couldn't keep my husband from seeing them. Even as my lips trembled I tried to stop it. To tell you the truth, I feel a little better. Maybe I will feel even more better, more complete, more whole, once I let myself slip some more into this vulnerable state of emotion: to cry; even if it's just a few tears on my pillow.